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BBall123
395 Posts |
 Posted - 04/09/2010 : 11:00:46
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I found this article, Its about Hockey but Man does it apply to travel baseball. wake up dads ! wake up coaches !
I Hope They Didn't Bring Apple Juice
Steve Simmons
Toronto, ON
By Steve Simmons
There was about two minutes to play in the playoff game and I was anxiously pacing behind the bench, barking out whatever instructions seemed important at that very moment. You watch the game and you watch the clock in those final seconds, sometimes precisely at the very same time.
We were up by a goal, poised to advance to the next round of the playoffs, when I felt a tug on my jacket.
"Ah coach," one of my players said on the bench.
"Yea," I answered, concentrating more on the game and the clock than on him at that instant.
"Are there snacks today?"
"Whaaaat?" I barked exasperated.
"Did anyone bring snacks today?"
"Huh," I looked away.
"I hope they didn't bring apple juice." The young boy said. "I don't like apple juice."
The moment froze me in all the playoff excitement, the way all special and meaningful moments should. If somehow, I could have captured that conversation on tape, I would have had one of those special sporting moments for parents everywhere, the kind you need to play for coaches and executive and trainers and managers and all of us who take kids hockey way too seriously. It isn't life or death, as we like to think it is. It isn't do or die as often as we pretend it to be. In one tiny moment in one game minor hockey was reduced to what it really is about. Apple juice.
OK, so it's not apple juice. But what apple juice happens to represent in all of this. The snack. The routine. The ritual. Kids can win and lose and not even give a second's thought about either, but don't forget the post-game drinks. If anything will spoil a good time, that will.
You see, it's all part of the culture of hockey. Not who wins, not who scores goals, not which team accomplished what on which night, but about whether mom and dad are there, whether their grandparents are in the stands watching, whether their best friend was on their team and they got a shift on the power play, and yes, about what they ate.
When you get involved in hockey, when you truly put your heart into the game and into the environment and into everything, it can be when it's at its best, the game is only part of the package. It becomes a social outing for parents. It becomes a social outing for children. It should never be about who is going for extra power skating and who is going straight from minor tyke to the Ottawa Senators but about building that kind of environment, the kind of memories kids and parents and families will have forever.
Sometimes, when I stand around the arenas I can't believe the tone of the conversations I hear. The visions are so short-sighted. The conversations are almost always about today and who won and who lost and who scored. Not enough people use the word fun and not enough sell it that way either.
Hard as we try to think like kids, we're not kids. Hard as we try to remember what we were when we were young, our vision is clouded by perspective and logic, something not always evident with children. Ask any parent whether they would rather win or lose and without a doubt they would say win. But ask most children what they would prefer, playing a regular shift, with power play time and penalty killing time on a losing team rather than playing sparingly on a winning team, and the answer has already come out in two different studies. Overwhelmingly, kids would rather play a lot than win and play a little. Like we said, it is about apple juice. It is, after all, about the experience.
You can't know what's in a kid's mind. I was coaching a team a few years ago when I got a call from the goaltender's father. It was the day before the championship game. The father told me his son didn't want to play anymore.
"Anymore after tomorrow." I asked.
"No," the father said. "He just doesn't want to play anymore."
"Did something happen?" I asked.
"He won't tell me," the father said.
I hung up the phone and began to wonder how this happened and who would play goal the next day when I decided to call back.
"Can I talk to him?" I asked the father.
The goalie came on the phone. "I don't want to play anymore."
"But you know what tomorrow is, don't you? Are you nervous?"
"No."
"Then what? You can tell me."
"I don't like it anymore."
"Don't like playing goal?"
"They hurt me," he said.
"Who hurts you?"
"The guys," he said
"What guys?"
"Our guys. They jump on me after the game. It hurts me and scares me."
"Is that it?"
"Yea."
"Do you trust me?"
"Yea."
"What if I told you they won't jump on you and hurt you anymore. Would you play then?"
"Are you sure?"
"I'm sure."
"Then I'll play."
And that was the end of the goalie crisis. The kid was scared and wouldn't tell his parents. The kid loved playing but didn't love being jumped on after winning games. You can't anticipate anything like that as a coach. You can't anticipate what's in their minds.
It's their game, we have to remember. Not our game. They don't think like we do or look at the sport like we do. They don't have to adjust to us, we have to adjust to them. We have to make certain we're not spoiling their experience. Our experience is important too, but the game is for the children and not for the adults. We can say that over and over again, but the message seems to get lost every year.
Lost in too many coaches who lose perspective and who think nothing of blaming and yelling and bullying. Lost by parents who think their son or daughter is the next this or the next that and they are already spending the millions their little one will be earning by the time they finish hockey in the winter, 3-on-3 in the summer, power skating over winter break, special lessons over March break, pre-tryout camp before the AAA tryouts in May and a couple weeks of hockey school, just to make certain they don't go rusty.
I have asked many NHL players how they grew up in the game. My favorite answer came from Trevor Lindon, who has captained more than one team. He said he played hockey until April and then put his skates away. He played baseball all summer until the last week of August. He went to hockey camp for one week then began his season midway through September with tryouts.
No summer hockey. No special schools. No skating 12 months a year. "I didn't even see my skates for about five months a year. I think the kids today are playing way too much hockey and all you have to do is look at the development to see it really isn't producing any better players. "We have to let the kids be kids."
When, I asked Gary Roberts recently, did he think he had a future in hockey. "When I got a call from an agent before the OHL draft," he said. "Before that, it was just a game we played."
Do me a favor: Until the agent comes knocking on your teenager's door, let's keep it that way. A game for kids. And one reminder, I don't care what the age: Don't forget the snacks.
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baseballpapa
1520 Posts |
Posted - 04/09/2010 : 18:26:37
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| If you can't bring the apple juice, Papa likes the Apple Ripple. Several umpires have requested that the Team Mom not bring Papa any of this Apple Ripple. This post was right on target. |
Edited by - baseballpapa on 04/09/2010 20:19:43 |
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gasbag
281 Posts |
Posted - 04/09/2010 : 19:02:19
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| Absolutely love this post ! At what age do we stop with the snacks and why ? I guess because we play so many games now it's hard to keep up with the snacks but I sure do miss those snack days. Some other things I miss,........team moms, cheering in the dugouts, game balls, stars awarded for your hat after the game, watching coach pitch and realizing I'm not the worst pitcher in the country after all !!!! |
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AA17Dad
211 Posts |
Posted - 04/09/2010 : 21:03:28
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That covers the point I have been trying to make for the last 4 years. I never put it that way or that well but I have sure try'd.
Awesome post
Gasbag, it really isn't about the snacks and team moms or cheering in the dugout.Unless you are 6 years old. It is about the kids, the families the game and the experience. |
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kingofthehill
40 Posts |
Posted - 04/12/2010 : 12:59:07
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| Awesome post. Too many trophy hunting coaches and parents that are wooried about their ego. Kids need to play, have fun, win a little, and lose a little. We tell our kids that sports are life and then go and try to find a team that goes 78-2 for the season. That ain't life and it ain't sports. Not real life. Winning is just part of the process but not the only process. I give some of you guys a hard time about "guest players" for the sake of winning only. My neighbor down the street in Cincy had a great player from 9-12. Then at 13 he fell to middle of the pack because he quit growing. At 15 he was thru with baseball because he had so much success as a young player that he could not handle being just okay and part of the team. Parents went nuts when he became average and started becoming very critical of him and his effort. In reality he was the same kid at 15 that he was at 12. Others caught him and others flew by him. Didn't make him a bad kid but his parents made him feel like he had failed. And when he was small, his parents let the occasional cuss word and bad grade by lil Johnny go. He became a bad student because baseball was his meal ticket in his parents eyes. Moderation is the key and this article sums it up well. |
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coachtony
236 Posts |
Posted - 04/12/2010 : 14:47:07
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I like it ;)
I tell people all the time that my kids HATE HATE HATE HATE to lose a ball game.....for about 10 minutes. Then all they care about is where are we going to eat or can they go cheer for their other friends who are still playing. It is us coaches who are still talking days later about how "if we had just made that one play" or "if we had not committed that one error". Sometimes we need to be reminded why we are here.
--T
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southpawmom
19 Posts |
Posted - 04/14/2010 : 20:39:09
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| My son is 14 and on a very competitive baseball team with other young men, most of them are approaching 6 feet tall or over 6 ft tall. Occasionally, another mom and I will bring them cookies for between games, and guess what? They LOVE it! The moral of this story is great and even at 14, it is still about the apple juice. |
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AA17Dad
211 Posts |
Posted - 04/16/2010 : 08:30:52
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quote:
Originally posted by southpawmom
My son is 14 and on a very competitive baseball team with other young men, most of them are approaching 6 feet tall or over 6 ft tall. Occasionally, another mom and I will bring them cookies for between games, and guess what? They LOVE it! The moral of this story is great and even at 14, it is still about the apple juice.
Guess what.....I'm over 14 and and 6' and if you bring me cookies between games I will eat them and probably LOVE them as well.
I was very impressed with the moral of the story. Although the snacks and team mom were used to make a point. I thought the point of the story went alittle deeper. I did not mean to offend any team moms or pastry chefs.
P.S. White flour and refined sugar could almost require a skull and bone POISON lable on it. The combination temporarily lowers ones IQ.
Not a good choice of a between game snack. Not to mention the blood sugar issues it will cause with " some " people.
Now, if you are 6.......... |
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I hope they dont bring apple juice
