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holly19
17 Posts |
 Posted - 07/13/2016 : 08:29:40
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| I'm just reflecting on our experience so far with "tryouts". How did we get to this state where we are losing sight of what's important? These kids WANT to play baseball (for the time being) and these kids still WANT to learn and develop. We are cutting kids from teams because they are good but just not "good enough" for this team and I quote that because that has been said to us. They are "one step away from a majors level so come back next year", "we are only taking the best". I will protect my kids spirit for the game of baseball and I promise not to tell them these things that people who call themselves "COACHES" are saying about 8 YEAR OLDS! End of vent, and good luck to everyone next season! Please remember that EVERYONE is developing and the most important thing about baseball is that you learn how to be a good loser and how to get stronger from that, how to never quit or give up, how an attitude and team cohesiveness is what builds champions, how hard work is what makes the difference. |
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in_the_know
985 Posts |
Posted - 07/13/2016 : 10:00:34
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My recommendation is that you know what the mindset and goal of the team is BEFORE trying out and plan accordingly. It would be far worse for a major team to take a "not ready for major yet" player and have to relegate them to mostly bench time during games. You'd be crying here later in the season for a completely different reason.
Don't get me wrong, I don't disagree with your premise, but the onus is on YOU the parent to determine to the best of your ability in advance what teams have goals and resources that best align with what you want and where your kids skill level fits and put him in that position with the best possibility to succeed.
Sounds like you're at the 8u level and getting your first real good taste of the travel ball grind. Your scar tissue will build, trust me, and you'll learn that what did or didn't happen at 8u will have little to no influence on what your son goes on to do in his baseball future, provided that you DO protect his spirit and that he doesn't become disillusioned to the point of quitting.
Do you homework as much as you possibly can and find a spot where you son can grow and be successful while maintaining a love of the game. It isn't easy, but it is done every year and you're fortunate enough to be where there are enough options around to fit everyone's needs.
Best of luck! |
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TRB
42 Posts |
Posted - 07/13/2016 : 10:25:45
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I'm not being disrespectful here but what do you want them to say? If they are advertising themselves as a major team then they are telling you up front what they are looking for. I would rather have someone be honest with me. It doesn't make them right, it's just their opinion. There are many many things that are far more important in baseball than learning to be a good loser. Show me a good loser and I'll show you a loser. Kids need to handle adversity and learn to handle losing with class, but they should never be comfortable or good at handling it. That is a major problem to me with kids now. The competitive nature of kids seems to be lacking severely vs years gone by.
With all that said it should come down to what your kid wants and what his goals are. If it's to have fun and just go play that is perfectly acceptable and there are many teams out there that do that. If it's to compete with the best and against the best then there are teams out there for that also. Kids change and grow and their desires change. For me personally, I want to put my son in adverse situations. I want him to appreciate the grind and learn what it takes to be successful. All of that has nothing to do with baseball, but baseball is game that can teach all of that. I do agree whats important has been lost. Baseball is like church, many attend few understand. Good luck with your search. |
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Crazyforbball
391 Posts |
Posted - 07/13/2016 : 13:05:35
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| I liken the yearly jostling for baseball teams to fraternity or sorority rush..you may WANT to pledge one or the other but you'll end up where you belong. Now at 8 the push to be "heavy majors" is laughable because as you will learn over the years many kids who are superstars now won't even be playing ball in a couple of years and the kids who are just getting started will produce top level majors players by 12 or 13. So don't let your feelings be hurt..and don't fault the coaches who are wanting to push for majors now. Their kids may very well be the ones who don't make the cut at 12. Find a team where your child can learn, grow, be successful and most importantly HAVE FUN at 8. There will be plenty of time to land a spot on a majors team down the road. |
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Punishers
688 Posts |
Posted - 07/13/2016 : 13:18:22
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| Welcome to the world of youth travel baseball. |
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oneZone
117 Posts |
Posted - 07/13/2016 : 14:06:11
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I agree with the comments above. There are far worse things that can happen than to have a coach give you honest feedback about your kid. One of the biggest problems, for both the kid and the team, is when he ends up playing at the wrong level -- whether above or below where he should be.
One thing to keep in mind, too, is that many teams will post open tryouts, take your $25 to $75, and then put your kid out there alongside 25 others to compete for one or two spots on their roster. And, as harsh as it may seem, you know they're perfectly willing to tell 23 parents "maybe next year" in order to feel that much better about saying "welcome" to those two who do make it!
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Mungo Fungo
9 Posts |
Posted - 07/13/2016 : 15:45:38
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I hope this helps you- When my son was 8U, he was the kid that made the second or third All Stars team. And I understood why: I didn't have or want an "in" with the coaches that were influencing decisions for the A team, and I also knew that he wasn't there yet. Fast forward 4 years, and he has just finished his 12U season on one of the top three majors teams in East Cobb, and I haven't coached since 9U to influence him getting there.
As for the majority of the kids that rostered that 8U A All Star Team? Half of them would be hesitant to play catch with my son, and quite a few others lost interest after not making the more competitive teams.
It's a journey, so enjoy the ride. And have fun watching, he will find his level. |
Edited by - Mungo Fungo on 07/13/2016 16:19:22 |
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holly19
17 Posts |
Posted - 07/14/2016 : 07:54:41
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quote:
Originally posted by TRB
I'm not being disrespectful here but what do you want them to say? If they are advertising themselves as a major team then they are telling you up front what they are looking for. I would rather have someone be honest with me. It doesn't make them right, it's just their opinion. There are many many things that are far more important in baseball than learning to be a good loser. Show me a good loser and I'll show you a loser. Kids need to handle adversity and learn to handle losing with class, but they should never be comfortable or good at handling it. That is a major problem to me with kids now. The competitive nature of kids seems to be lacking severely vs years gone by.
With all that said it should come down to what your kid wants and what his goals are. If it's to have fun and just go play that is perfectly acceptable and there are many teams out there that do that. If it's to compete with the best and against the best then there are teams out there for that also. Kids change and grow and their desires change. For me personally, I want to put my son in adverse situations. I want him to appreciate the grind and learn what it takes to be successful. All of that has nothing to do with baseball, but baseball is game that can teach all of that. I do agree whats important has been lost. Baseball is like church, many attend few understand. Good luck with your search.
Oh absolutely, and I noted many of the benefits of playing sports, not just losing. I disagree, the problem with kids today is the entitlement and lack of respect caused by coddling parents. My point is that these coaches prefer bad attitudes, hateful competitive parents over an actual winning formula: an athletic kid with great work ethic and an "almost" major level ability. I guess they don't believe in their coaching ability. It's fine, I told my kid what they said. The honest truth is right now it's a popularity effort, if you came from this team or that all star team you probably have an in, with the exception of a few. I'm thankful for this process, you get to weed out the ugly. |
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holly19
17 Posts |
Posted - 07/14/2016 : 08:02:10
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quote:
Originally posted by oneZone
I agree with the comments above. There are far worse things that can happen than to have a coach give you honest feedback about your kid. One of the biggest problems, for both the kid and the team, is when he ends up playing at the wrong level -- whether above or below where he should be.
One thing to keep in mind, too, is that many teams will post open tryouts, take your $25 to $75, and then put your kid out there alongside 25 others to compete for one or two spots on their roster. And, as harsh as it may seem, you know they're perfectly willing to tell 23 parents "maybe next year" in order to feel that much better about saying "welcome" to those two who do make it!
Oh true...and that was my issue. It would be honest and more accepting if it was backed up with proof. That was the problem. It wasn't the ability, it was they already had someone/something else planned. Just be honest that you had a full team already or that you were looking for one particular aspect (ie. pitching). Then I could have been honest to you that my son is a soso pitcher, we could have passed on your "tryout". |
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holly19
17 Posts |
Posted - 07/14/2016 : 08:21:05
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quote:
Originally posted by Crazyforbball
I liken the yearly jostling for baseball teams to fraternity or sorority rush..you may WANT to pledge one or the other but you'll end up where you belong. Now at 8 the push to be "heavy majors" is laughable because as you will learn over the years many kids who are superstars now won't even be playing ball in a couple of years and the kids who are just getting started will produce top level majors players by 12 or 13. So don't let your feelings be hurt..and don't fault the coaches who are wanting to push for majors now. Their kids may very well be the ones who don't make the cut at 12. Find a team where your child can learn, grow, be successful and most importantly HAVE FUN at 8. There will be plenty of time to land a spot on a majors team down the road.
Well, my feelings aren't hurt. HA! If it were me, I couldn't wait to play against the coaches who cut me :) Your statement above is what I was alluding to however, these get rich now coaches have no clue and hence why you see "this is a no drama team" always advertised. |
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CaCO3Girl
1989 Posts |
Posted - 07/14/2016 : 08:46:57
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| Why shoot for majors so early? AAA kids can sling the ball very well and your kid will get more time on the field on a AAA team, plus it's usually cheaper! I don't see the down side here. |
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Crazyforbball
391 Posts |
Posted - 07/14/2016 : 10:33:21
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| Sounds like a team you wouldn't want to be on any way..if who they picked really was a "popularity contest" then reeks to me of Daddy ball and your kid likely never would have seen his spot anyway. It would have been a frustrating year watching the "favorites" get all the playing time and positions despite their ability. We have all "been there done that" who are not in the "club"...like someone said above, welcome to travel ball and I'm sad to say it doesn't go away. Consider it a blessing in disguise that your son didn't make this team and I am sure he will be able to find another equally competitive team! You don't really want spend a whole year and all that money, plus every single weekend with those "hateful competitive parents" any way!! |
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SuperStar
257 Posts |
Posted - 07/14/2016 : 21:54:26
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| Many of the comments above are spot on. Travel ball is a journey, and it takes time to get everything sorted out, but you will. Lets be honest. All folks want their kid to be the best and get praises often, but that is not always the case in travel ball. Especially at the higher levels. The good news is when players are young, they have plenty of time to develop. The key to it is they must rally love the game, play it because they like to play it, and compete because that is what drives the them. The kids that eat, drink, and sleep baseball are the ones that excel. Example would be even when a kid is off the field he is always thinking baseball, and putting in the hours to get better. Keep an open mind and keep at it. You and your son will find a team that is suitable for yourselves. Good luck on the upcoming season. |
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CaCO3Girl
1989 Posts |
Posted - 07/14/2016 : 23:54:23
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There are times that it is a popularity contest but be very careful what you say to your children. Most of the time it isn't a popularity contest it is sour grapes and excuses made by parents. I'm not saying that is the case this time BUT we see what we want to see and our children get our impressions.
I saw a 12 year old who couldnt pitch 45mph, but they were strikes. He could only dribble the ball in the infield, but he hit every ball, and then he threw the ball in by tilting his whole body to the side, it got in but WAY off course. The coach said that wasn't what they were looking for the parents said what you aren't looking for a kid who can throw strikes, hit anything pitched to him AND throw the ball in from the outfield, whatever, you obviously have your favorites.
Parents have a take on their kids skills, coaches often have a different take. |
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bballman
1432 Posts |
Posted - 07/15/2016 : 09:40:46
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Hang in there Holly. Not every kid will make every team they try out for. Use it as a motivator. I have a story with my son on this. I'll try to keep it short.
When my son was 11, he was asked to play on a travel team in the fall. He had been playing rec. He accepted and played very well. We went to the end of the year banquet. It was a lot of fun. After the banquet, when we were leaving, coach asked if son was coming to tryouts for the spring. We responded we weren't sure. He seemed surprised and said we "better be there". Son winds up going to tryouts and winds up not making the team. We were all devastated. First time I really saw my son cry about something like that. We went back to rec and played that spring. Well, at the end of the travel season, this coach calls us and asks if son could fill in for their end of the year, out of town tournament. I asked son and after some talk, he decided to do it. Well the parents that weren't there in the fall all freaked out, asking why son wasn't on the team all spring. We just said "he tried out, but was cut". They were very surprised. Son played multiple positions in the field and pitched for them and was a HUGE contributor. Felt good to get a little retribution!! Haha.
Fast forward to freshman year in HS. My son was pitching varsity and we went to the school district of this same coach. He showed up to the game. Our team was never very good, but the school we were playing was ranked #6 in the state in 6A (highest classification at that time). My son pitched a complete game against them, losing 1-0. The game only lasted an hour and 15 minutes. We joked with that coach about him being the only coach to ever cut my son. As my son went on to play 4 years in HS and 4 years in college, that coach remains the only coach to ever cut my son. It's nice to go out and prove someone wrong... |
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RoamingCF
77 Posts |
Posted - 07/15/2016 : 09:59:02
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quote:
Originally posted by SuperStar
Many of the comments above are spot on. Travel ball is a journey, and it takes time to get everything sorted out, but you will. Lets be honest. All folks want their kid to be the best and get praises often, but that is not always the case in travel ball. Especially at the higher levels. The good news is when players are young, they have plenty of time to develop. The key to it is they must rally love the game, play it because they like to play it, and compete because that is what drives the them. The kids that eat, drink, and sleep baseball are the ones that excel. Example would be even when a kid is off the field he is always thinking baseball, and putting in the hours to get better. Keep an open mind and keep at it. You and your son will find a team that is suitable for yourselves. Good luck on the upcoming season.
So much agree with this. Below 13U, find the balance between development/playing time, and challenging your child to be his best. You don't need to be on the top team, but a team that faces the top teams and has to compete with the speed of the game...probably the ideal situation for many kids.
Those that seek only a top team need only check out the discussion re: scholarships in this blog. There is a small handful of special (draftable) kids in each age, and a slight more that might play D1 - but it is not a majority (even for major level kids). Allow growth opportunities for your child, don't be discouraged when at 10U your kids is smaller than the 12 kids on The A Team, and learn how to compete and be a great teammate. |
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sebaseball
101 Posts |
Posted - 07/15/2016 : 10:42:00
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quote:
Originally posted by SuperStar
Many of the comments above are spot on. Travel ball is a journey, and it takes time to get everything sorted out, but you will. Lets be honest. All folks want their kid to be the best and get praises often, but that is not always the case in travel ball. Especially at the higher levels. The good news is when players are young, they have plenty of time to develop. The key to it is they must rally love the game, play it because they like to play it, and compete because that is what drives the them. The kids that eat, drink, and sleep baseball are the ones that excel. Example would be even when a kid is off the field he is always thinking baseball, and putting in the hours to get better. Keep an open mind and keep at it. You and your son will find a team that is suitable for yourselves. Good luck on the upcoming season.
I agree that you have to put your work in, but eating, drinking & sleeping baseball prior to 15U to me is a kid ripe for burning out. As much as we want to help our kids become all they can be, we also have to help protect them from themselves. There are certainly some kids who lock in and are sigularly focused at a young age and excel, but there are many more who get their belly full by the teen years and quit playing all together. There are countless numbers of kids who don't take it as "serious" at the younger ages who end up just fine. |
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unitedballers
29 Posts |
Posted - 07/15/2016 : 17:15:15
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| If the glove doesn't fit, you must... uh, er, never quit! |
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SuperStar
257 Posts |
Posted - 07/16/2016 : 14:56:46
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quote:
Originally posted by sebaseball
quote:
Originally posted by SuperStar
Many of the comments above are spot on. Travel ball is a journey, and it takes time to get everything sorted out, but you will. Lets be honest. All folks want their kid to be the best and get praises often, but that is not always the case in travel ball. Especially at the higher levels. The good news is when players are young, they have plenty of time to develop. The key to it is they must rally love the game, play it because they like to play it, and compete because that is what drives the them. The kids that eat, drink, and sleep baseball are the ones that excel. Example would be even when a kid is off the field he is always thinking baseball, and putting in the hours to get better. Keep an open mind and keep at it. You and your son will find a team that is suitable for yourselves. Good luck on the upcoming season.
I agree that you have to put your work in, but eating, drinking & sleeping baseball prior to 15U to me is a kid ripe for burning out. As much as we want to help our kids become all they can be, we also have to help protect them from themselves. There are certainly some kids who lock in and are sigularly focused at a young age and excel, but there are many more who get their belly full by the teen years and quit playing all together. There are countless numbers of kids who don't take it as "serious" at the younger ages who end up just fine.
Like I said, the kid is the one that must love and have a desire for the game. But, you are right, if the kid is being forced to play all the time and being pushed by the parents, coaches, etc, then that is a recipe for being "burned out". You've heard the old saying in the job world. Find something you really love doing and you will never work a day in your life. Do something just to make a living, and well....., you work just like the majority of us. LOL! |
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Crazyforbball
391 Posts |
Posted - 07/16/2016 : 21:13:35
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| It ALWAYS has to be about the kid, not the parent. I have an eat, breath and sleep-er but it's all him. We don't do baseball outside of the team. If there is burn out, it will be his own doing. We have to make him take a break and come in, but from a purely healthy perspective, it still beats a day of x-box to play wall ball off the house all day, just in my opinion! |
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What's important?
