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sirlurker
187 Posts |
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bballman
1432 Posts |
 Posted - 02/16/2012 : 21:42:24
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| Great article. |
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90mph
26 Posts |
Posted - 02/17/2012 : 09:04:28
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quote:
Originally posted by sirlurker
I'll go along with most of this article....
Yes...most of it. I find it interesting that someone would ask a pro player what he did not like as a kid. If he were to say "my parents made me run too much", we would say, didn't that make you the player you are today?
And yes, as parents there is a "line", but it is not always the same line for each kid.
I read the article last evening. Then asked my two sons what they thought this morning. One son said..."yeah don't blow sunshine up my ass, I want to be better! The other son never said a word.
So, please stop with the you are over the top if you are "negative".
There is more to the story....a balancing act. I wish my parents would have said "nice game, you will get them next time"...A LOT LESS and kicked my.....
And sometimes the only time to tell someone something and make it count is when the pain is still fresh.
http://www.thepostgame.com/blog/more-family-fun/201202/what-makes-nightmare-sports-parent
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Hurricane
351 Posts |
Posted - 02/17/2012 : 10:37:24
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| Good point. If the kid made pro the parents did something right. Ask the kid who quit was he disliked the most about playing youth sports. |
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bkball
173 Posts |
Posted - 02/17/2012 : 11:50:05
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| My dad road me pretty good and I did fine playing D-I college baseball. "What is my worst memory from playing youth and high school sports?" To be honest for me it was probably more to do with injuries or watching other team mates get injured. |
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Coach D
167 Posts |
Posted - 02/18/2012 : 22:33:17
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| I notced this article states it surveyed "college athletes" s. This being said wouldnt it be more revealing to compare those to kids that did not make it to college ball . Maybe there is something to be said about advising your kid the truths about the game they just played and not blowing smoke . Though I do agree the ride home is definetly not the place for it . As my son has already advised me of the fact he doesnt like to talk about the game on the way home . Though I can t help still pointing out the good things he did to help his team and the good things other kids did to help the team . Maybe on the ride to the next practice you slip in the things he could have done that may have slipped away or that could help him to improve his game . |
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90mph
26 Posts |
Posted - 02/19/2012 : 11:40:33
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quote:
Originally posted by Coach D
I notced this article states it surveyed "college athletes" s. This being said wouldnt it be more revealing to compare those to kids that did not make it to college ball . Maybe there is something to be said about advising your kid the truths about the game they just played and not blowing smoke . Though I do agree the ride home is definetly not the place for it . As my son has already advised me of the fact he doesnt like to talk about the game on the way home . Though I can t help still pointing out the good things he did to help his team and the good things other kids did to help the team . Maybe on the ride to the next practice you slip in the things he could have done that may have slipped away or that could help him to improve his game .
Good post Coach, and I have tried to think along those lines also. I would love it if it were that easy. I know that sometimes that we say the hurtful things at what seems like the wrong time. But...sometimes that is when it has the most impact. These are my kids...I NEVER want to say the hurtful things. I do want to have them understand that if they want success...there is a price to pay.
I guess what I dislike the most is the blogs and opinions that state, "just love the kids and encourage them". Yes I agree, and when they get "D" and "Fs" on their report card let us see if that ride home is filled with "thats okay you will get them next year"?
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Coach D
167 Posts |
Posted - 02/19/2012 : 20:44:39
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| @90 I think you are right on . Its all about balance. Another point my son made was that its alot easier to here the negative things after a win .After a loss its usally a pretty quite ride home with mine , he as most competetive players , wants to win them all! |
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nastycurve
244 Posts |
Posted - 02/19/2012 : 21:32:21
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| 90mph I agree totally. The thing is, parents better learn how to sell it to their kids if they want them to buy into what they are talking about. When my son was 9 I told him we would do it like this: After the game he would tell me 3 things that he needed to improve on/messed up on and 3 things that he did well and helped the team with. What ended up happening is he looked at his mistakes as something he needed to fix rather than something I needed him to fix, and his successes he enjoyed even more. |
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Steel-Will
278 Posts |
Posted - 02/20/2012 : 22:46:38
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| That's good stuff NC |
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Steel Bats
15 Posts |
Posted - 02/21/2012 : 11:37:26
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@nasty curve....great advice. Wish I had done something like that with my son earlier on.
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Coach D
167 Posts |
Posted - 02/21/2012 : 15:46:23
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| NC I Like it , Im gonna see if I can implement that!!! |
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gasbag
281 Posts |
Posted - 02/22/2012 : 16:21:39
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I've graduated to a "lessons learned" approach with my son over the years....what he did well, what not so well, what was most fun, what opposing player s did well, what his team mates did well, what his team needs to work on etc. When I changed from talking at my son to talking with my son, he really began to show more interest and I actually learned a lot more about him ! It's a great experience and keeps the game fun and interesting for the kids.
Also as he's aged, our discussions have graduated to the psychology of the game and approach etc. At 15, he's really showing some keen insights and thoughts ! Sometimes the stuff he comes up with "blows me away" !!!! |
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HITANDRUN
436 Posts |
Posted - 02/23/2012 : 12:32:09
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| At some point your son will know more about baseball and his team then you will watching from the stands. Why we even talk to them after a game is beyond me. Just go watch the game and enjoy the game. Kids don't want to hear about baseball from someone that didn't play at a high level, that is why they will listen to a coach that tells them the same thing you have been saying for years. |
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gasbag
281 Posts |
Posted - 02/24/2012 : 08:48:56
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quote:
Originally posted by HITANDRUN
At some point your son will know more about baseball and his team then you will watching from the stands. Why we even talk to them after a game is beyond me. Just go watch the game and enjoy the game. Kids don't want to hear about baseball from someone that didn't play at a high level, that is why they will listen to a coach that tells them the same thing you have been saying for years.
Hey HitnRun...at 16, don't they know more about everything than us Parents ? LOL !!!! |
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HITANDRUN
436 Posts |
Posted - 02/27/2012 : 13:32:09
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| They certainly think they do. LOL |
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nastycurve
244 Posts |
Posted - 02/28/2012 : 22:36:47
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| Thanks guys, glad I could share it with you. Its cool to get in the car and hear him go through it and then request with his trainer to work on some things that will help him overcome his errors. |
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bbmom2
119 Posts |
Posted - 03/05/2012 : 07:46:48
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| Just have to say "thanks." After reading this post, took it to heart and just listened this weekend after the games. It was fun to say "I had fun watching you play." We still had discussions because he talked about the game (well mainly how rude the other team was) but really watched content. Not only during the ride home but during dinner break. Thanks sirlurker for sharing the article! |
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HardBaller
101 Posts |
Posted - 03/05/2012 : 15:53:38
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I'll admit I followed SirLurker article as well with great results.
It is cool to let him know I love watching him play and he just sort of opens up and talks as he needs to; mostly about the umps.
I'll just take notes and we'll work on what we need to and there is really no need to have a long beat down conversation after the game or during the ride home.
Thanks for taking the time to post. |
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Being a good sports parent
