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jakespop
19 Posts |
 Posted - 11/08/2011 : 13:23:12
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Apologies for the long message for a short question but I wanted to provide some background information.
My younger son is playing on a 10U travel team. After becoming accustomed to Rec All-stars 3x+ wk practices and games on weekends, our expectations were high going into travel ball.
I understand the Fall schedule tends to be lighter due to other kids playing various fall/winter sports am ok with the reduced schedule to a certain degree. My concern is that the team was billed as a high AA team (even AAA) however after a few months of practice and 4 tournaments, it is apparent they have a long way to go before attaining that level.
I'm ok with losing if the team learns from the mistakes however I'm not sure they are. Additionally, I'm not sold the coaches are addressing the obvious lack of skills (read as level of daddy ball) on many of the players. I'm not seeing the level of intensity or practice drills needed to help this team grow. (Yes I've talked to the coaches). I believe they have a plan and perhaps it's just not moving at the pace I expected.
Additionally, I'm not getting the warm & fuzzy from the other parents. Comments like "We'll they are only 10" tell me they are not as committed or my family is too intense (definitely a possibility). I understand the comments however the other teams that are kicking our butts are also 10 and the talent is there. The skills can be developed but my concern is whether or not they will be.
On the positive side, my son is getting a lot of playing time at various positions.
We have completed the Fall season and are supposed to be moving into Winter workouts (speed / agility and basic indoor drills). I may actually pay for extra camps / lessons to keep my son on track with my apparently unrealistic expectations :-)
The bigger issue is that I really want to surround my son with Coaches and players who will push him to excel. Grow his skillet and continue his love of the game.
So my question is....What are your thoughts on changing teams mid year?
I'm not saying my kids makes another team, just wanted to kick the tires or do we suck it up, honor the commitment and move on in the summer. I don't want to burn bridges but also don't want my son to regress.
Your feedback is appreciated
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Gwinnett
791 Posts |
Posted - 11/08/2011 : 14:10:51
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| First, do whats best for your son! Its end of fall and there's plenty of time before spring to explore many other options for your son. Sometimes there's not a good fit on a team for one reason or another. If your going to pay you have a choice. Your not married to the team. Sure, in a perfect world a hand shake and your word, work just fine, but, nothing is EVER perfect. It's good to honor your commitments but it's a lot worse to be unhappy and resentfull all season. Trust me, you and your son won't like those feelings all season. Your gut will know what to do........ |
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SSBuckeye
575 Posts |
Posted - 11/08/2011 : 14:17:14
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| Unless something egregious happens, I would stay the course. Take next season to check out other teams that you like and then talk to their parents and coaches. Try out next summer for the teams you like and make a more informed decision. That's just general advice as there are certainly many reasons why you should not follow the advice. I'm old-fashioned. If you make a promise, you keep it. But, at the end of the day you have to do what's best for your son. Do it once and I don't think there are ramifications. Do it every season, and word will get out. |
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bballman
1432 Posts |
Posted - 11/08/2011 : 14:21:16
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I agree with Gwinnett. And wow, a post where, apparently, the coaching was better at the rec level than the travel level. Just goes to show that moving to travel ball does not always mean that you get better coaching. One of the biggest arguments I hear about why people's kids can't play rec is that the coaching is so much better in travel.
Jakespop, find another team if this one is below your expectations. The way I see it, you have fulfilled your obligation to play with this team for the season (fall). There should be plenty of opportunities available for a decent spring team. At 10 years old, you shouldn't be expected to give a committment for both fall and summer. Learn a lesson from this and do your homework before selecting your next team. Good luck to you and your son. |
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3sondad
220 Posts |
Posted - 11/08/2011 : 14:22:43
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| As the kids get older, most teams are constantly bringing in other players. Looking for a little better offense, a little better defense and always looking for pitching. Usually players leave on their own when they no longer are starters and I have seen kids cut. |
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wareagle
324 Posts |
Posted - 11/08/2011 : 14:31:44
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Every team is different. The key is to find the one that is right for your son.
#1. Is He Happy and having fun?
#2. Is he learning and improving?
#3. What are his expectations for the team?
My son (and me) personally would not be happy on a team that was not competitive. He has friends that are happy to get to play a little extra when rec ball is over. There is no right or wrong answer except to find a place where he (and the family) are happy and improving.
Doesn't sound like you are having fun, if your son's feelings are the same then move on. Let the coaches know as soon as possible so they can find a replacement. The coaches should understand and should not want you to stay if your son is not learning and enjoying the game.
With that being said, if he is happy, try to understand that at 10U alot of the competition has been together for several years. It will take time for the coaches and kids to come together and improve individually and as a team. |
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AllStar
762 Posts |
Posted - 11/08/2011 : 14:52:23
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quote:
Originally posted by Gwinnett
First, do whats best for your son! Its end of fall and there's plenty of time before spring to explore many other options for your son. Sometimes there's not a good fit on a team for one reason or another. If your going to pay you have a choice. Your not married to the team. Sure, in a perfect world a hand shake and your word, work just fine, but, nothing is EVER perfect. It's good to honor your commitments but it's a lot worse to be unhappy and resentfull all season. Trust me, you and your son won't like those feelings all season. Your gut will know what to do........
Agree with Gwinett, but would also caution you to remember that he is 10. If you think it's going to be a train wreck, get out, but if you want to change because you think it will cause him not to make his HS team, trust me, it won't affect that goal.
Did he have fun? |
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Outtahere
43 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2011 : 08:07:17
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| I agree with SSBuckeye your son is 10U so do your homework as you play this year and tryout for the teams that you like and coaches that are actually coaching. I understand leaving if you are miserable and so is your son, I have moved teams once. But agree with Buckeye that if you keep moving you will be labeled as a teamjumper and some coaches will not take a chance on you. This may be a good time to show your son that we fulfill our commitments and then leave after spring. Best suggestion: talk to the coach and ask what the plans are for the spring season as far as training, tournaments and your/his expectations. Fall is definetly different in travel. Good luck to you and your son. |
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in_the_know
985 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2011 : 09:27:29
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A couple of thoughts.
First, how did you get in this position to begin with? I ask that because if you leave this team, but do nothing different with respect to selecting your next team, there is no guarantee that you will be better positioned to meet your goals.
Second, what are you REALLY looking for? Did you list those prior to selecting/being selected by the current team? Did you share those thoughts with the current coaches before accepting a slot and are now feeling like they misrepresented or did you just assume because this was a travel team you were going to get what you expected?
Third, is this an established team with experienced coaches or a first year team where coaches are just entering travel from the rec/all-star level? If the latter, then things might change as the coaches begin to recognize what you do or, as you seem to allude to in your original post, these guys are daddy ballers and only interested in putting their kids where they want.
Fourth, what options are in your immediate area or how far are you willing to travel to get what you seek? One great thing about metro Atlanta (assuming you're in this area) is that there are a TON of options available. Only challenge is that some are a long drive and others are a short (but time consuming) hop a way. Figure out how far you're honestly willing to travel for practices, etc., on a very regular basis.
Finally, given all the above, what will you do differently in choosing the next team and what is a REALISTIC timeline to be able to do this? As you see on the various "looking for players" posts, there is movement between teams between fall and spring. But I really recommend that you take an inventory of what it is you want and what you're willing to do to achieve those goals. Then, after you have your list, really shop around. I'm not sure that you can do this in the winter season as there isn't alot of activity to monitor what's going on. Ask alot of questions of people who have been around your age group to identify the coaches and programs that have a reputation (good and bad) and seek & avoid accordingly. One challenge you'll face is that alot of the teams/programs that you'd prefer have solidified their rosters for spring and simply have no openings. You may need to wait until 11u to try out for the teams/programs that you really prefer.
Since you're entering the 10u age, you have plenty of time. You could spend this upcoming season with the outlook of scouting those other guys to find out where you want to be. Use this time to continue to work and develop your son outside of and in addition to your current team. Take advantage of him getting to play alot of positions at this time as it will only better prepare him for the future. My sons are in the various programs that they participate in today because of what we saw when playing other teams. I have a list of coaches that my boys would never be allowed to play for as well as a list of those teams that I would approach should they not make the teams they wish to play for. This was developed over time and through observation, something that you likely didn't have when making your first jump.
Like the other posters here, you certainly don't want a miserable experience, but you need to define what that is for you. If you end up on a team with great coaching and facilities, but the parents are a bunch of pin heads who are only happy if their kid is playing a certain position, etc., etc., then you may be more miserable than with otherwise poor coaches and good families. I'm not saying that you settle for that in the long term, only that the current situation may suffice until you can do your homework. What you really need to do is figure out EXACTLY what you're looking for and begin to seek it. I think jumping now just because you have seen what you don't want isn't going to put you any closer to getting what you do want without changing your approach. You may not find a perfect fit, but by knowing what it is you want you're more likely to come closer than you are today.
Good luck. |
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Steel-Will
278 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2011 : 10:31:07
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Great question and I can only reiterate what has been said already; do what's best for your son and family period, point-blank.
The spring season is long and NOTHING is worse than being frustrated for a long season knowing that you have only yourself to blame ultimately. YOU SHOULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING.
Take action NOW. Don't rely on the coaches glowing description of the team, their capabilities, the past successes and future goals.
Ask COPIOUS questions until the picture of the team, coaches and players becomes FULL HD 1080p-3D clear and you know exactly what you're dealing with.
One small rule of thumb; there is nothing wrong with dads coaching their sons on the teams you're looking at; however, those kids better be REAL good (preferably the best on the team) especially if the coaches sons play the same position as your son. Nothing is worse than getting stuck behind a coaches son who can't handle the action while your son gets pushed around, or worse yet, gets stuck on the bench.
Know what position your son will play in advance and work doubley-tripley hard that he can handle it especially if coaches sons play the same position.
Good luck and most of all, make sure your son is learning, developing and having BIG, BIG fun. |
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Critical Mass
277 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2011 : 20:16:25
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| Pop....put him in position to play on a team where he gets lots of time where he wants to play, has fun and improves his skills. There is an IMMENSE amount of hype on youth baseball from 8-13 and some deserved, IMHO (and i am guilty of being super-sensitive of the right team, coaches, kids, usssa level and every game's performance in past years...my son is now 15 and i was the dumb one)...other than his desire and development, it doesn't really matter. On the whole if he loves the game, he will settle into his groove. At 14 and 60/90, everything changes, the game slows down and pitching rules. You will find out if he has the drive(most important) and skills to play at a higher level. Thats when the work becomes part of the fun if his goals are to be the best he can be and compete....that is cool to watch. My son left rec at 7 and went travel, we have played on 5 teams over that time span. I thought my son lost it at 12 until cooperstown (awesome experience and performance 4th out of 106 teams) and struggled again at 13...he has come full circle and has a personal goal to make varisty as a freshman and lead. Avoid the usual pitfalls of gutless coaches who play their kid ad-nauseum, getting caught up in "travel team status" and support him above anything else. I'll finish my pizza and curtail my diatribe, a la Jerry maguire (techincally it was a "mission statement") Enjoy these years, they are indeed, priceless. :) |
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AllStar
762 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2011 : 10:36:34
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quote:
Originally posted by JMO
I am in a similar situation, son is not happy
'nuff said |
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Gwinnett
791 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2011 : 11:58:05
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Thank you JMO. All I can say is I'm very proud of him. He just loves the game. Hes the same with school--over the top. Thank you God!!
quote:
Originally posted by JMO
Gwinnett
Completely agree with you. If it's not the right fit, then move on. Remember, somewhere the grass is greener, you just need to find where. I am in a similar situation, son in not happy and there is a lot of daddy ball going on. What I did was find out as many coaches names in my kids age group and emailed then if they needed a guest player during the fall. Most were aware of my son, so he was always invited to guest play. This helped us tremendously in watching how the coaches "Coach" how they interact and what they teach the kids. Most importantly "do they play daddy" ball. I always found out who the coaches kid was, was he the best player on the team, was he a role player, and how much preferential treatment was he receiving if he was not the stud. I know my advice may be to late in the season to do this, but maybe it will help in the future. Remember this about loyalty, YOU NEED TO BE LOYAL TO YOUR KID FIRST!
Gwinnett, your kid is a stud pitcher, very impressed!
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Thoughts on Changing Teams
