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| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| rippit |
Posted - 03/28/2012 : 10:56:15
A couple/three things on this topic:
1 - A dad complaining about a coach and while doing so cuts down that coach's kid and his batting average. And afterward says: "I'm not trying to be one of THOSE dads". Rolling my eyes. "Excuse me, but you just did."
2 - A dad reading his kid the riot act directly after a game and where other people were gathered.
3 - Am I TOO soft when it comes to my own son? I do manage to get him to every practice, pay for private instruction and otherwise go above and beyond when it comes to about 95% of the parents I know. However, lately heard a coach getting on to him for what appeared like an attitude that he didn't care about even being where he was. Good for that coach, but it made me start to wonder if I should push from my end??? Does that make sense?
In an effort - a REAL effort - not "to be one of those parents", maybe I'm not pushing enough? I'll bite his head off in public with any signs of him showing disrepect to others, but I'm not going to rub salt in an open wound because he looked at strike three or made an error that cost the team the game. I'm pretty sure he's good at beating himself up plenty.
The thing that prompted this post though, is I see the frustration in an instructor who sees the potential in a kid, but feels that the kid doesn't want it badly enough. I know better and I'm wondering if any of you have some ideas for me on how to explain all this to my son.
Would be nice to be a sports shrink at times like this! |
| 17 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| rippit |
Posted - 04/16/2012 : 13:51:55
quote:
Originally posted by bkball
LOL, I said to myself if rippit replies back today before Lunch, then they are truly a baseball alcoholic. It was less than an hour.... wow.
Hey cut a chica some slack!! It's Monday which is the equivalent of basebalk tournament hangover day. I gotta do something to ease the withdrawals right?? Besides, smartphones keep the forums right in front of me 24/7! |
| bkball |
Posted - 04/16/2012 : 13:17:31
LOL, I said to myself if rippit replies back today before Lunch, then they are truly a baseball alcoholic. It was less than an hour.... wow. |
| ramman999 |
Posted - 04/16/2012 : 13:14:32
quote:
Originally posted by bkball
Back to the original question.
When they post too much on a baseball forum. LOL
Well, since I'm guilty as charged, allow me:
You might be THAT parent if... You not only post on your own state forums, but started posting on neighboring state forums as well 
And forums on the other coast! (sorry C_B, couldn't resist, if I'm going down in flames, I needed a co-pilot!) |
| rippit |
Posted - 04/16/2012 : 10:11:13
quote:
Originally posted by bkball
Hey sign me up too. lol
(Standing up) "My name is Rippit and I'm a baseballdiscussionboardaholic."
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| bkball |
Posted - 04/16/2012 : 09:19:30
Hey sign me up too. lol |
| rippit |
Posted - 04/13/2012 : 13:33:35
quote:
Originally posted by bkball
Back to the original question.
When they post too much on a baseball forum. LOL
Touché!! Does anybody know if there's a 12 step program for addiction to baseball discussion boards?! |
| bkball |
Posted - 04/13/2012 : 08:24:36
Back to the original question.
When they post too much on a baseball forum. LOL |
| loveforthegame25 |
Posted - 03/30/2012 : 21:13:09
I was this dad to some degree when my 16 yr old was 6-7-8-9-10-11. I love and appreciate my son so much for not hating me. I've learned how much of an ass I was to him when all he did was love the game and his dad. We have a great relationship now. Thank goodness. Please dads. Your son wants to please you. Don't blast him for anything other than bad sportsmanship. Be there for them!!! |
| AllStar |
Posted - 03/30/2012 : 15:42:46
quote:
Originally posted by bkball
For the experienced parents and coaches who have been there. Does the player who is always a clown or cutup during practice ever grow out of that?
I hope not in my son's case. He's all business between the lines or, if he's not in the game at the time, while play is ongoing, but joking around and cutting up is part of his personality and I wouldn't want that to change as long as it's at the appropriate time. If he was disruptive he'd wear out a path between the poles, trust me.
If you watch any mlb game you'll see some clowning around going on in the dugout, so obviously some of those guys didn't outgrow it either. This isn't life or death stuff... |
| UGA12 |
Posted - 03/30/2012 : 13:59:20
I love this post as it hits close to home. After 3 years of Travel Ball my son says to me after the WS last summer "Dad, I don't want to have to worry about baseball during football season this year." I respected his request because for 3 years of his life it was either football or baseball and during the fall it was both. After a very successful year in football, I had 3 coaches call inquiring about his intentions so I asked my son who he wanted to go work out with first. His reply...."Dad, I don't want to play baseball. It's boring." The bottom line is that while he was good on the diamond, it's not in his blood. He wanted to play Lacrosse so there you have it. I'm learning a new sport and he is playing,competing and HAVING FUN!
quote:
Originally posted by in_the_know
quote:
Originally posted by AllStar
quote:
Originally posted by rippit
The thing that prompted this post though, is I see the frustration in an instructor who sees the potential in a kid, but feels that the kid doesn't want it badly enough.
I'm not sure what he is seeing that makes him think that, but one theme on this board is to always go full tilt because you never know who is watching.
I've made that point to my son on a couple of occasions because he is pretty happy-go-lucky. I would never want to squelch even one bit of that, but I also don't want him to give his coaches and teammates the impression that he doesn't care, so he needs to be aware of the situation before he cuts up.
Great point. Alot of times kids don't quite understand the impression they give. But on that note, perhaps the kid doesn't want it that much (or as much as you want it for him).
If you weren't fortunate to see the ESPN 30 for 30 documentary on Todd Marinovich, find it and watch it. GREAT perspective on over-the-top. One of the best lines from the show came from Todd who said "Just because you're good at something, does that mean you're born to do it?"
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| ramman999 |
Posted - 03/29/2012 : 17:30:44
As a father who also has been my son's coach, I had to learn how to separate the dad and the coach, and when to put the "coaches" hat on, and take it off (ie. car rides home, after bad games, etc.) - nothing sucks the fun out of a kid more than the coach that doesn't stop riding the kid until he goes to bed - quickest way to make him hate the game. Usually the dad hat came back on when we got in the car, and stays on until the next morning - he's old enough now to know what he did wrong. Hopefully it's the right approach, and he seems to still love the game, so maybe I'm on to something..
Depending on the age and the level really determines when the goofing off should stop, but honestly, the ones that take it serious don't typically fool around much once they take the field - dugout and sidelines are a little different - thats just the kids personality, but if they are goofing off at practice or between the lines, I typically see a lot of running in their future.. Call me old school..
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| in_the_know |
Posted - 03/29/2012 : 16:09:40
quote:
Originally posted by bkball
For the experienced parents and coaches who have been there. Does the player who is always a clown or cutup during practice ever grow out of that? Does the player who is in it for himself, get upset at other players when they miss his throw or wont high five a player trying to pick them up change? Do the players that don't give 100% continue to not give 100%. I haven't been in it long enough to know but so far I haven't seen any major changes over the years in these type players, they usually just pick up with another team each season?
Varies, some do change, some don't. Players that were never a problem with attitude & behavior can change to the kids that are. I haven't seen any consistency except that I'm often surprised to see how much change there's been in a kid 2-3 years down the road. Sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. |
| bkball |
Posted - 03/29/2012 : 14:16:46
For the experienced parents and coaches who have been there. Does the player who is always a clown or cutup during practice ever grow out of that? Does the player who is in it for himself, get upset at other players when they miss his throw or wont high five a player trying to pick them up change? Do the players that don't give 100% continue to not give 100%. I haven't been in it long enough to know but so far I haven't seen any major changes over the years in these type players, they usually just pick up with another team each season? |
| rippit |
Posted - 03/28/2012 : 15:11:07
"Full tilt". Well said!
I think you may have hit on something - I think he tends to relax around folks who know him pretty well, but he shouldn't because he needs to give them the same 100% he'd give a stranger who didn't know him. So, maybe we are half way there.
And, in the know is correct - things mean more coming from someone else besides me right now. I'll continue to encourage, support and be his #1 fan, but I just don't want to be "that parent" who pushes, and pushes and nags, and nags. I've seen other kids this age not even make eye contact when their dad is barking out orders, er, uh...coaching him.
And you are correct...he's 14. |
| in_the_know |
Posted - 03/28/2012 : 13:26:46
quote:
Originally posted by AllStar
quote:
Originally posted by rippit
The thing that prompted this post though, is I see the frustration in an instructor who sees the potential in a kid, but feels that the kid doesn't want it badly enough.
I'm not sure what he is seeing that makes him think that, but one theme on this board is to always go full tilt because you never know who is watching.
I've made that point to my son on a couple of occasions because he is pretty happy-go-lucky. I would never want to squelch even one bit of that, but I also don't want him to give his coaches and teammates the impression that he doesn't care, so he needs to be aware of the situation before he cuts up.
Great point. Alot of times kids don't quite understand the impression they give. But on that note, perhaps the kid doesn't want it that much (or as much as you want it for him).
If you weren't fortunate to see the ESPN 30 for 30 documentary on Todd Marinovich, find it and watch it. GREAT perspective on over-the-top. One of the best lines from the show came from Todd who said "Just because you're good at something, does that mean you're born to do it?" |
| AllStar |
Posted - 03/28/2012 : 12:53:52
quote:
Originally posted by rippit
The thing that prompted this post though, is I see the frustration in an instructor who sees the potential in a kid, but feels that the kid doesn't want it badly enough.
I'm not sure what he is seeing that makes him think that, but one theme on this board is to always go full tilt because you never know who is watching.
I've made that point to my son on a couple of occasions because he is pretty happy-go-lucky. I would never want to squelch even one bit of that, but I also don't want him to give his coaches and teammates the impression that he doesn't care, so he needs to be aware of the situation before he cuts up. |
| in_the_know |
Posted - 03/28/2012 : 12:32:27
My "for what it's worth" opinion.
There are two sides of the fence. The field side and the bleacher side. What happens on the field side is the coaches territory. What happens on the bleacher side is the parents territory.
There are times when the two cross and it's appropriate for either coach or parent to react accordingly. If your child is being disrespectful, showing poor sportsmanship or not being a good teammate to others, then it is completely appropriate for you to interject (albeit, not while he's on the field). These are character issues that parents mold. Likewise, if a player is showing those same characteristics on the "bleacher" side of the fence, then it's completely appropriate for the coach to address if he's observed it.
I don't believe that in any circumstance it's appropriate or should be your agenda to make a public spectacle of the event for "show" and benefit of other parents or coaches. Your points 1 & 2 above are completely inappropriate in my opinion. As to point 3, all kids will continue to need their parents encouragement (aka nudging). There will be times when even the most motivated kid simply doesn't want to be there and it can't help but show. As long as these are not the norm, let the coach take it. It will mean more coming from him than having to hear it from you every time. It's nice to see what what we've been teaching our children validated by other figureheads. Means we're not as much of a tool as our kid thinks (or, the coach is as big a tools as us).
I think from your posts you have a 14 yr old. God bless you. Taken a couple through that 13-16 stage and that's when all the character teachings in the world seem to take a temporary hiatus. |
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