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Coaches, Parents, and the Tryout Dilemma

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[quote][i]Originally posted by morgamania[/i]
[br]I started coaching youth baseball when I was 19 years old. Now some 24 years later having the experience of coaching with no sons on the team, to coaching my older boys team for years, to coaching my younger boys teams for years I feel I have seen the good, bad, and ugly of travel ball.

Certainly a lot has changed over the years. In the past travel ball was almost a mysterious black art with very few teams and none of them below 12u. Most notably the tryout period and experience has changed. It wasn't that long ago that July tryouts were unheard of with all of them occurring in August or even September. Now it seems team are moving their tryouts earlier and earlier each year in an attempt to secure a committed roster before other teams do. (On a different post someone noted where the ECB official tryouts are in August but several ECB teams seem to be holding tryouts in advance of that date.)

During this 4 week period parents, players, and coaches are often on an emotional roller coaster. I call it the Silly Season. For coaches the reality these days is that every player is a free agent on a one year contract. If you have an established team you have to deal with attrition. Sometimes a little and sometimes a lot more than you had hoped for! You work on player retention at the same time you are trying to attract new players. However, as soon as you feel you just secured a couple ringers to join your already solid squad you find out a couple of your "core" players have made plans to leave for greener pastures. You wonder what did you do wrong that those players are leaving.

If you're trying to form a new team good luck! You have all of the issues that the established team has only more so. While you are busy trying to get commitments the parents of these players are worried that you won't have enough to complete a roster (or that the caliber of players won't be good enough to compete). Once again, as soon as you think you've got some players secured and are working on the last 3 or 4 you need you find out (often through the grapevine) that the players you thought you had secured are going to other tryouts, etc.

In either case don't take it personally. They're just hedging their bets. From a parents point of view they don't want their child to be left out in the cold having missed out on other tryouts and the team they had committed to falls through. From a coaches point of view it may appear that parents have the "grass is greener" approach when they leave for another team. More often than not they get some things they were looking for and also get a few things they did not wish to have in the new team.

In the end every parent is really just trying to do what they feel is best for their child. I always wish them well and thank them for letting me coach their child. Always leave your bridges un-burned. The travel ball world is pretty small and you never know when you might be playing with them again. If you love them, let them go. In the end every player needs to be on a team where they can be both challenged and successful.

Travel ball is cyclical. We have periods of expansion where there are lots of travel teams out there and periods of contraction where teams merge or fold altogether (see the recent post on the Venom). Everyone is trying to compete with the Bandits or Red Sox but few are really ready to commit to the team approach that would be necessary to do so.

As you wander through this silly season remember to step back from time to time, take a deep breath and breathe out slowly. In the end it's just baseball and I suppose we shouldn't be so stressed about it.

I'm making this post because I'd like to hear from the community - coaches and parents, your thoughts and feelings on this topic. I wish everyone well in their travel ball plans for next year!
[/quote]

T O P I C R E V I E W
morgamania	Posted - 07/29/2010 : 23:23:41 I started coaching youth baseball when I was 19 years old. Now some 24 years later having the experience of coaching with no sons on the team, to coaching my older boys team for years, to coaching my younger boys teams for years I feel I have seen the good, bad, and ugly of travel ball. Certainly a lot has changed over the years. In the past travel ball was almost a mysterious black art with very few teams and none of them below 12u. Most notably the tryout period and experience has changed. It wasn't that long ago that July tryouts were unheard of with all of them occurring in August or even September. Now it seems team are moving their tryouts earlier and earlier each year in an attempt to secure a committed roster before other teams do. (On a different post someone noted where the ECB official tryouts are in August but several ECB teams seem to be holding tryouts in advance of that date.) During this 4 week period parents, players, and coaches are often on an emotional roller coaster. I call it the Silly Season. For coaches the reality these days is that every player is a free agent on a one year contract. If you have an established team you have to deal with attrition. Sometimes a little and sometimes a lot more than you had hoped for! You work on player retention at the same time you are trying to attract new players. However, as soon as you feel you just secured a couple ringers to join your already solid squad you find out a couple of your "core" players have made plans to leave for greener pastures. You wonder what did you do wrong that those players are leaving. If you're trying to form a new team good luck! You have all of the issues that the established team has only more so. While you are busy trying to get commitments the parents of these players are worried that you won't have enough to complete a roster (or that the caliber of players won't be good enough to compete). Once again, as soon as you think you've got some players secured and are working on the last 3 or 4 you need you find out (often through the grapevine) that the players you thought you had secured are going to other tryouts, etc. In either case don't take it personally. They're just hedging their bets. From a parents point of view they don't want their child to be left out in the cold having missed out on other tryouts and the team they had committed to falls through. From a coaches point of view it may appear that parents have the "grass is greener" approach when they leave for another team. More often than not they get some things they were looking for and also get a few things they did not wish to have in the new team. In the end every parent is really just trying to do what they feel is best for their child. I always wish them well and thank them for letting me coach their child. Always leave your bridges un-burned. The travel ball world is pretty small and you never know when you might be playing with them again. If you love them, let them go. In the end every player needs to be on a team where they can be both challenged and successful. Travel ball is cyclical. We have periods of expansion where there are lots of travel teams out there and periods of contraction where teams merge or fold altogether (see the recent post on the Venom). Everyone is trying to compete with the Bandits or Red Sox but few are really ready to commit to the team approach that would be necessary to do so. As you wander through this silly season remember to step back from time to time, take a deep breath and breathe out slowly. In the end it's just baseball and I suppose we shouldn't be so stressed about it. I'm making this post because I'd like to hear from the community - coaches and parents, your thoughts and feelings on this topic. I wish everyone well in their travel ball plans for next year!
15 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First)
jongamefan	Posted - 08/06/2010 : 13:21:59 Can I get an "AMEN" ? You hit it square ! quote: Originally posted by AllStar quote: Originally posted by coach0512 I don't get why we have made travel ball such an unpleasant experience for everyone. Find a team where your kid will get playing time and where he will have fun and enjoy the season! Because it became a business instead of a game. Because it's not about the kids, it's about the dads and, in some cases, the moms.
AllStar	Posted - 08/05/2010 : 16:27:41 quote: Originally posted by coach0512 I don't get why we have made travel ball such an unpleasant experience for everyone. Find a team where your kid will get playing time and where he will have fun and enjoy the season! Because it became a business instead of a game. Because it's not about the kids, it's about the dads and, in some cases, the moms.
bbmom2	Posted - 08/05/2010 : 14:21:14 Someone once told me that for 12U and under - travel baseball would be great if all the kids were orphans! ;-)LOL!
Goin Deep	Posted - 08/05/2010 : 07:44:17 Lefty Bat, That would be FORMER East Cobb coach as I understand it.
coachdan06	Posted - 08/05/2010 : 02:05:10 Coach you make a strong point and here is the answer : because the parents have taken it over all the way from who is picked for a team down to how there sons attitude will be on that team , based of course on how the parents feel about themselves . Gosh just they cant have little Joey get cut off a team where his classmates play, how embarrassing ! so better get working on the coach , making inside deals with the organization heads etc. Yep thats right its about the parents now , I mean who thinks the kids themselves messed it all up ?! quote: I don't get why we have made travel ball such an unpleasant experience for everyone.
coach0512	Posted - 08/04/2010 : 21:55:28 Good post LeftyBat. There are far more bad coaches out there causing issues than players. Good rant G-Man. Dead on with most of it. It has gotten WAY out of hand. My son tried out for 4 teams. Three offered positions and one did not. I turned down one team before dealing with another. I explained to my son that there are times in life when you're not gonna make the grade and you have to bounce back from it, believe in yourself and move on. I don't get why we have made travel ball such an unpleasant experience for everyone. Find a team where your kid will get playing time and where he will have fun and enjoy the season!
LeftyBat	Posted - 08/04/2010 : 18:43:38 quote: Originally posted by ECB Braves Someone create a coach's corner to post players who don't keep their committments and switch teams mid-season. We all know a bunch of them and could help each other out. Some even do this intentionally every year as a way to not pay fees. On the flip side with that, someone should post a page where coaches committed to players and then cast them aside in the fall when a better player became available. I could start with an east cobb coach, but I will take the higher road....
loveforthegame25	Posted - 08/04/2010 : 18:09:19 Braves, some switch teams because things changed when they signed.. Coaching changes, false information, personality conflicts, abusive coaches etc. Some changes are necessary. Mid Season there was probably a coaching issue, especially when multiple kids leave the team.
G-Man	Posted - 08/04/2010 : 18:06:49 Where is it that you as a coach have the right to try and blackball or smear a players name by trying to create a list of players because they left a team mid-season? See I think this is one of the problems in travel baseball. This is youth baseball and these are kids. People leave teams for a number of reasons and in most cases its because of a coach. Now whether that parent is right or wrong for leaving because of a coach where does that give you or any other coach the right to try and blackball a kid? Why would you want to try and hurt a child because whether you are right or wrong that is what will happen. If the kid was no good then why should you care as a coach. I only see coaches trying to smear another players name because the kid was good and them leaving hurt that coaches fragile ego and no matter what, that coach wanted a little payback. Do you really think that the kids care that Johnny left your team for another? Do you think that because a kid leaves a team that the other kids now will dislike him? I personally think a lot of this travel ball stuff is getting way out of hand. I also think that as adults we should be taking some lessons from our kids because they are smarter than we give them credit for. When I played ball you didnt have all this nonsense. Now you have coaches making money off their teams. I personally know some youth coaches who make more in a year coaching youth baseball than some college coaches. Now you have teams charging for tryouts for younger and younger age groups. Now you have coaches trying to blackball certain kids because their ego's were bruised. Now you have parents trying to get in to bidding wars for their kid to join a team. Now we have everybody and their brother trying to make a buck off of kids youth sports. Does anyone other than me see a problem with this? What has happen to the sense of giving back to the community and trying to give whether it be our own kids or others less fortunate the opportunities we never had. What has happened to the concept of these are kids playing a youth sport. I have one son who played MLB and I never had to deal or see all the nonsense I have with my younger son. I just cant understand the mindset of people in this thing we call travel ball. quote: Originally posted by ECB Braves Someone create a coach's corner to post players who don't keep their committments and switch teams mid-season. We all know a bunch of them and could help each other out. Some even do this intentionally every year as a way to not pay fees.
ECB Braves	Posted - 08/04/2010 : 16:41:56 Someone create a coach's corner to post players who don't keep their committments and switch teams mid-season. We all know a bunch of them and could help each other out. Some even do this intentionally every year as a way to not pay fees.
morgamania	Posted - 07/30/2010 : 13:08:02 touchemall - I'd say communication is they key. It is a fair question to ask the coach what is their window for making roster decisions. It is also okay for you to tell them what your window is as well. In the meantime go to as many tryouts as you can. This will be good experience for your player. It's a bit of a dance but if both parties are honest and communicate everything will work out best in the end and no hard feelings either way. in_the_know - You hit the nail right on the head! The law of supply and demand determines to an extent who has more of the decision making power -the parent or the coach. It really is all about integrity. Communicate and be honest. A close friend of mine who also manages a travel ball team told me this story: A player tried out for his team. After some follow up calls to the parent he was informed that of the three teams they were considering they were going to decline to play on his team. He was okay with their decision and asked what factors led them to decide to say no. The answer he got was that he (the manager) did not voluntarily share his teams roster and stats with them! If you think that's bad the story continues. When asked which of the other two teams they had decided to accept an offer from he was told that they had told both teams "yes" and they were discussing as a family which one to reneg on. Precisely what in_the_know was referring to! I told my buddy as strange as it seems he lucked out in not getting this player/family on his team. He could have been one of the ones told "yes" to, subsequently not offer a spot to a different player, and in the end lose both players due to this lack of commitment and integrity.
in_the_know	Posted - 07/30/2010 : 11:27:07 From a parent's perspective the best approach we've found is to select and prioritize the list of teams & coaches for which you wish to play. This when all your homework should be completed regarding your various questions regarding coaches philosophies, etc. Then you need to embark on the tryout circuit. If your stars align, then the order of the tryouts would happen to coincide with your order of team wish list priority with your number one choice having their tryouts first and so on. Then you would continue with your tryouts while you wait to hear if you won a spot on your first choice. When things don't align, then you end up trying out with your second or third choice teams and potentially get an offer before your first choice even has their tryout. If this is a risk, then I highly recommend that you schedule a private look for your player in advance and be honest with the coach that he is your first choice, but that you will continue with your 2nd, 3rd�. to protect the best interest of your player. Here�s where the tricky part really comes into play, and the integrity of the family reveals itself. If you get an offer to your lower choice team before your top choice has made a consideration, then you need to decide whether to take that offer or run the risk of passing and then not getting your top choice (the old one-in-the-hand vs. two-in-the-bush question). If you choose your �lesser� team, then commit, stick with it and don�t look back (this is the integrity thing I mentioned earlier). If you want to hold out for your first choice, tell the coach, thank him for the offer and hold out and hope. You�ll probably hear the coach say that he needs a commitment now so that he doesn�t pass and then miss out on the next kid on his list. This isn�t a pressure tactic, it is a reality. He�s trying to fill out his roster with the best match of players and families he can find and can�t run the risk of missing out on 2 or 3 other players while he waits for 1. This is where the whole thing gets ugly. What is beginning to develop are scenarios where families are �committing� to an offer, then continuing to try-out, looking for their better offer, then backing out of their commitment if that better offer comes. This is selfish and affects far more than the one family. There might have been a kid hoping to make his Team A that was passed on and subsequently accepted an offer on Team B because the Team A offer never came. He might have been the next call on that coaches list but because Johnny accepted, that call never came. Now Johnny backs out and not only is the team he reneged on affected, but so is the family that isn�t and otherwise could have been where they hoped to be. As morgamania suggests, the whole tryout "silly season" isn�t personal (in most cases), but merely the shuffle of coaches trying to find the chemistry and players that best fits their goals as well as families trying to do the same. In the end, I believe that once a commitment is made, it is held. We�re already reading posts where kids have committed and backed out of their commitment which, frankly, are inexcusable.
bmoser	Posted - 07/30/2010 : 10:00:32 Do not miss any tryouts if there's a potentially compatible team for your son holding a tryout while waiting for an offer from a coach of a prior tryout. quote: Originally posted by touchemall How long after a try-out should a family consider waiting for the coach to make a decision before they start looking elsewhere so they do not miss opportunities?
touchemall	Posted - 07/30/2010 : 09:51:31 How long after a try-out should a family consider waiting for the coach to make a decision before they start looking elsewhere so they do not miss opportunities?
SSBuckeye	Posted - 07/30/2010 : 09:32:37 Bravo! Very well stated. Having just gone through the process of forming a team for this past season, I can assure you that it's a difficult proposition. I had to get commitments from parents of great kids even though we were not, on paper, an official team, and didn't even have a field or great prospects to secure one! Fortunately, a lot of great people had faith in our ability to deliver on the things we said, and we ended up with an awesome field situation, and everything went the way we said they would. This season is much less stressful, as we're only looking to fill out a few spots on our team. That said, the whole process puts both the kids and coaches in a bad spot, as the timing of offers is all over the board. I take the view that if it was meant to happen, it will. A couple of boys we really liked found better situations for them, and I was happy that they found what they were looking for. Conversely, we attracted several boys that liked our situation over others. I think I've said this before, but as a Buckeye fan, I really admire the Jim Tressel approach to recruiting. Basically, here's who we are, here's what we've done, and here's what we can do for your child. If that works for you, and you're the right fit for our team, then we have a match. If not, then no hard feelings. This is still 11u baseball. I'm more concerned about harmony on the team, so I'm not going to put a big sell job just to get a stud that may help us win a handful more games. Not worth it. After going through this for a season, I have great respect and admiration for any coach who takes the time to give kids an opportunity to play this great game of baseball. It's a TON of work, if you do it right. But the rewards are worth it.

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